Marriage, Divorce, and Military Families

Running boss Marriage, Divorce, and Military Families Marriage, Divorce, and Military Families Marriage is a conduit through which idols grace flows to the couple and their children. The church understands sexual union among a serviceman and woman to be a sacrament, a visible sign of the grace that God gives them to help them live their lives here and now so as to be able to join him in eternity. Marriage is friendly as well as religious, but its religious aspects are very important. The leger repeatedly compares the relationship between man and wife to that between God and Israel or between delivery boy and his Church.For unification is a holy vocation. Since the Church sees wedding party as holy, it believes it must be treated with reverence. It to a fault recognizes that marriage is basic to the health of society and therefore a public institution that must be defended against harm. Marriage is a public institution. Consequently, proposals that could harm the institution of marriage must be subjected to the same carriage of objective analysis that we give any public policy question. Marriage is not just a private matter of emotion between two people. On the contrary, its success or failure has measurable impact on both of society.Rational analysis yields solid, objective reasons for limiting marriage to champion man and one woman-reason anyone cannister agree with on purely secular grounds (Zinn, B. M. , D. Eitzen, S. , Wells, B. , 2008). However, one of the downsides to redefining marriage would be the weakening of the meaning of marriage, which would be breaks. Human nature being what it is, if the meaning of marriage is weakened, it will be psychologically easier for even more people to carve up. Look at what happened when no-fault separate was legalized. The divorce rate skyrocketed.If the nature of marriage is further undermined in the minds of couples then when things get rocky, more couples will be tempted not to pop off through th eir problems and get happy again but rather to divorce and mark well-nighone else (Hogan,P. ,,R. ,2010). That is a bad idea, because most marriage therapists agree that divorce generally doesnt work. Divorce doesnt solve the problems that caused the first marriage to break up. Divorced people bring the same problems to their new marriages that broke up their old ones. Thats why second and later arriages are statistically far more comparablely to end in divorce than first marriages are. Also, a large majority of couples who contemplate divorce but stay together run along themselves as happily unite five years later. So staying together works better than divorce. The Romans had an fire view towards marriage matrimonia debent esse libera or marriages ought to be free. This meant that either spouse could opt out of the marriage if things werent working out for them. Centuries later, Victorian England had a vastly different view (Bouvier, 1856).People got married and stayed toget her for better or for worse. Society frowned on divorce and divorced people were likely to find themselves social pariahs. In the present century, both these views prevail. It depends on which part of the planet you live in and in what kind of culture. Divorce rates are higher(prenominal) in European or American countries, where singular freedom is given higher stress, than in, say, Asian or African ones, where familial and social opinions cause higher stress. With globalization, of course, the backward countries are catching up.Women, especially, with access to higher education and higher salaries, are less volition to put up with traditional roles and expectations (Devine). Social and cultural moralists are having a field day, predicting, like always, fearsome consequences for the social fabric. No, divorce isnt joy-inducing, but then neither is a corrosive marriage. In much(prenominal) a case, splitting up is preferable to staying together for the children or to keep up socia l appearances. Anyway, it all really depends upon the kind of relationship you stand.Some relationships are worth working on, some arent. in that respect are many different and complex causes and reasons for divorce, each of them specific to that particular couples married relationship, their individual experiences and personal problems. None of them may seem common to the people going through a divorce, of course, but many of the reasons recur enough to warrant the term. These causes for divorce may vary from the lack of lading to the marriage to the lack of communication between spouses infidelity abandonment Physical, sexual, or even Substance Abuse, etceteraFurthermore, it takes a very special person to stand and accept that the rest of their lives are devoted to something big than themselves and their own little worlds. It takes an incredible commitment and an enduring love to withstand a life livelihood someone else who may not be there by their beside on days when you are whimsy blue, and who may not hold you in those prison terms when the life around you is not so sweet. Now, marriage is hard enough, there are times when all husbands and wives question the sanity of a relationship that requires such hard work.Couples get through this by being together and keeping at it as a team. Sadly, many soldiers relationships do not have this luxury of being together to keep things on track. This is when the armament husband or wife just has to sort through couple issues alone (Rentz et al, 2007). solo the sloppedest committed individual can carry the weight of two in a relationship, and it takes a strong intimate trusting bond to make it at all possible. The military eases the lives of service members and their families in some very significant ways. Paychecks are regular.Benefits, such as healthcare and legal assistance, are unparalleled in the civilian world. And, in a time of economic uncertainty, the job security provided by the armed forces is a true blessing (Rentz et al, 2007). However, every positive aspect of military life is matched by at to the lowest degree one negative, especially for married service members and their families. Military and civilian marriages face the same marriage-stressors and marriage-killers, but the challenges face by military marriages are both compounded and additional (Banner, 2008).Danielle Rentz and associates argues that the impact and stress of war may occur before, during, and after deployment and extend beyond the military soldier to include stress and emotional fluster for his or her family. Anticipation of deployment can lead to feelings of anger, resentment, and hurt within the family. Separation during deployment may create the self-reliance of new family roles by the partner left behind, disruption of family routines, uncertainty about the service members safety, and the inability to plan for the future (Rentz et al, 2007).They base their discussion on the research and studie s on the Effect of Deployment on the Occurrence of Child Maltreatment in Military. Betty Myers writes a testimony of her days married to a military man and unravels a story from past that lead to divorce. Her story is yet another cause for divorce within a military family. The stress of war and unknowing of what occurs to a spouse takes a terms on a marriage. This is a testimony of her personal experience and this will assist my paper for the causes of divorce (Myers, 1988). Bennington Banner analyzes the statistical entropy of military divorce rate in every branch of the arm Forces.He states that the long and repeated deployments required of many troops have been widely blamed for precious stresses on military couples. Spouses at home must manage families and households without their partner. He concluded that there were an estimated 10,200 failed marriages in the active duty Army and 3,077 among Marines, according to figures obtained by The Associated Press for the budget year ended Sept. 30. His data can help me prove the point that the numbers of divorce in the Arm Forces are keel (Banner, 2008). Joseph Devine explains that military marriages undergo a very specific set of strains.They face the possibility of sudden moves to faraway locales, rapid deployments, and even premature death. He stated when youre married to someone in the military, its often like youre married to the military itself (Devine). Your life revolves around what the military wants from you and your spouse, and theres not a whole lot you can do about it. In summary, the ways in which each military marriage survives are all personal and unique to their own, but the emotional journey is one that can really be mum only by another military spouse (Hogan,P. ,,R. ,2010).The one thing all military spouses have in common with each other is their ultimate pride in their husbands and wives, and to survive the journey as a military spouse, their shared pride of place alongside their incredi ble military husbands and wives. While military marriages are an entity of their own, the non-military couples could learn many things from them. The special goodbyes for instance are important. A military husband or wife knows the value of not leaving issues unresolved, and has learned the art of letting the silly things go (Hogan,P. ,,R. ,2010).They do not have until the afternoon, or the next day or the day after that to get all over it, they are too aware that tomorrow is unpredictable. A military marriage does not have the time to wallow in unimportant debate. The most important thing to them is to be sure to let the one they love know that they are appreciated. Petty unimportant arguments have a way of clouding the categorical love that holds a marriage together. References Banner, B. Divorce rate up in Army, Marine Corps. (2008,December3). Retrieved February 3, 2010, from ProQuest Newsstand. (Document ID1606239161). Bouvier, J. (1856).Matrimonia debent esse libera. (n. d. ) A Law Dictionary, Adapted to the Constitution and Laws of the United States. Retrieved April 27 2010 from http//legal-dictionary. thefreedictionary. com/Matrimonia+debent+esse+libera Devine, J. Divorce and the Military. Retrieved from http//ezinearticles. com/? Divorce- and-the-Military=3605202 Hogan,P. ,,R.. (2010). Marriage and the Military Evidence That Those Who shell out Marry Earlier and Divorce Earlier. Armed Forces and Society,36(3),420. Retrieved May 4, 2010, from Career and Technical Education. (Document ID2002732321). Myers, B. (1988).Story Of A cast aside Military Wife. Minerva,VI(2),77. Retrieved February 3, 2010, from ProQuest Central. (Document ID624746591). Rentz, E. D. ,Marshall, W. S. ,Loomis, D, Casteel, C. , Martin, S. L. , Gibbs, D. A. (2007). Effect of Deployment on the Occurrence of Child Maltreatment in Military and Nonmilitary Families. American Journal of Epidemiology,165(10),1199-206. Retrieved February 3, 2010, from ProQuest Health and Medical Complete . (Document ID1268687131). Zinn, B. M. , D. Eitzen, S. , Wells, B. , (2008). Divorce and Remarriage. (Ed. 8) Diversity of Families (pp. 393- 410). Prentice Hall